To Have and Obey

I might come off like an über-feminist sometimes, but I have rational and honest reasoning when it comes to weddings. The ceremony is based on the primitive exchange of a daughter for trade. That's the historical foundation for the occasion. Religion isn't even a factor at this stage. In actuality there are numerous modern instances most people don't have an occasion to ponder until they are themselves a bride.

My fiancé reported that one of his male friends actually asked him why he was working on the wedding. “Isn't she supposed to be doing all of this?”

For a very long time, we have adherently obeyed the traditional life-long terminal goals of marriage and procreation. To not follow this destiny still invokes judgment and shame to this day. More and more of us are starting to see the relevance to this logic at this day in age, translating to an absence of wifely training. NOT ALL LITTLE GIRLS PLAN THEIR WEDDINGS BEFORE THEY GET THEIR PERIOD.

Everyone has wedding fever, because after we announced our engagement 7-10 other couples we know followed suit with engagements, weddings, and elopements. Bridal gowns were being scouted out, locations were being critiqued, and excitement was abundant...for the brides. Because that's what the bride is 'supposed to do.'

I'm not your typical tomboy, but there was a point in my adult transformation where I stopped caring about looking perfect at all times of day. Being a makeup freak as a teenage girl, this was a somewhat foreign concept. Nonetheless, I stopped wearing makeup during the week, and exclusively reserved the paint for nights out dancing and boozing. It was probably an effect of my deep-seeded laziness. Falling right in line with the lack of makeup and hair preparation were other stereotypically 'girly' traits. For example, I unconsciously stopped sucking in my gut, stuffing my feet into ridiculously dangerous and painful shoes, and adopted a previously foreign appreciation of professional spectator sports.

All women are not created equal. Not all females have an inherit need to get married and make lots of babies. And some men actually want to take part in wedding plans. Unfortunately, the people who need to learn this stuff will never be able to wrap their minds around it, but that's a whole new can of worms.

Labels: bride, chauvinism, feminism, marriage, sexism, wedding